Chronic Illness

I was reading somewhere that 1 out of 3 people deals with chronic pain or a chronic illness. I thought it was high, but when I really started looking around at the people around me, I found that 1 out of 3 is actually a pretty accurate number. Everybody I know seems to be in pain, on multiple medications or has Cancer. It's almost abnormal not to have one of these three problems.

I personally can handle being ill if it lasts a day or two, but when it never goes away that is something that is very difficult to deal with. I can't help wondering what the point is when people have to deal with long term suffering. What are we supposed to learn? If there is a lesson involved can it be taught in a way where people don't have to suffer? I believe in God and I believe that he has a plan for everyone's life. What I don't understand is how the world can become a better place when 1/3 of the population is sick?

It seems like the last eighteen months life has been something to get through instead of experience. I have found myself kind of just dropping out of life. I talk to people on the phone occasionally, but don't have the energy to go out and do anything because it's always filtered through being sick, which makes it difficult to squeeze any enjoyment out of anything. I would rather just stay home.

I remember that when I was younger I would rather be dead then home on a Friday or Saturday night. Now, I'm in bed by 9:30 or 10:00 on the weekends and 75% of the time or more, a big night out is going to El Pollo Loco for chicken and then coming home and reading or watching a movie. I know it would probably do me some good to just go out and do something, but I just can't muster the energy to do so.

I think I'm going to take a nap.